Cartagena Columbia

After being roused from my slumber at 5.00am (yes you are reading that correctly!) to witness the ship starting its entry to the port of Cartagena I sat myself down for a buffet breakfast and indulged in some scrambled eggs and smoked salmon. You enter Cartagena through a choke point only 180 metres across. There are two 16th century Spanish forts on opposing points. The city has been attacked by the French, The Dutch and the British and ultimately became heavily fortified. The Spanish were running all of their Peruvian silver and gold through here and weren't keen on having it conveniently hijacked by competing nations, or for that matter, pirates. 

We headed to the Convento de la Popa located strangely enough at the Top of Mount Popa. It's origins date back to 1607. It was built after a Friar had the Blessed Virgin appear to him, telling him to build a church on the nearest hill to Cartagena. Apparently said hill was tormented by an evil spirit, in the form of a goat. Once the building was complete, and consecrated the goat was thrown from the precipice to rid the church of this assault on God's good graces (I mean they didn't even slaughter it). This was supposed to restore Christianity to the region. I think personally it may have been the first recorded use of a product that Colombia has subsequently become more famous for, but there was mention of this in any of the interpretive material. 

The convent changed hands after various invasions and Simon Bolivar even kept his regiment there when he was freeing South America from the Spanish. Locally he is known as El Libertador, or the Liberator of America. He led Colombia, Bolivia, Panama, Venezuela, Peru and Ecuador to independence. 

From there we pushed on the old town, inside a walled city. Beautiful period architecture, tastefully maintained and presented in all of its pristine glory. This picture of perfection was somewhat offset by the ridiculous number of touts trying to sell hats, chess sets, magnets and other ephemera. I felt like reenacting that scene out of Flying High.

The one thing I didn't get to try was some real Columbian Coffee, even though we went to a coffee shop (I know right). I bought a packet to bring home so hopefully its allowed back into the country. 

After wandering around the old town and visiting an emerald shop, apparently Columbia is known for quality emeralds as well, we adjourned to a delightful restaurant in an old harbour fort and watched the world go by. Try as I might there was no way I could tell if any of the boats motoring past were Columbian drug runners. I certainly wasn't going to ask. 

I jumped back on the ship only carrying Columbia's second mast famous export and had a little nanna nap. Before I knew it we were heading out of the harbour, past the the forts, past the new city, and past all of the cigarette boats, ready for our entry into the Panama Canal at 6.00am tomorrow morning (yes you read that correctly)! 

Plus I got to see an Anteater, some Macaws and a flock of Flamingoes. 

I'm Going Back To Miami

Sadly, Miami doesn't have the same collection of memorable tunes as New York. Sure Miami has Gloria Estefan and the Miami Sound Machine but the only number I can remember is the old Wayne Cochran tune Going Back To Miami, which I knew from the second live Blues Brother album Made In America. So I didn't have many songs to sing as I was wandering about Miami. I possibly should have been thanked for this by the owners of small animals and the parents of young children. 

The ship docked at 7.00am and was ready for disembarkation by 7.30am. I on the other hand bounded out of bed at 9.00am, had a lovely buffet breakfast and took a leisurely stroll down the gang way at about 10.30am. From there I jumped one of the 100's of cabs lined up and waiting and went to a museum I had meant to visit last time I was here. In 1916 a rich Chicago industrialist by the name of James Deering who was the founder International Harvester moved in to his summer house Villa Vizcaya now known as the Vizcaya Museum and Gardens. 

It had been designed to sit on 120 acres and appear like a lost Roman ruin when viewed from the water, complete with concrete ship wreck. It was tastefully furnished with antiques acquired from around the world. The designer had no compunction in cutting down a pair of ornately carved 400 year old church doors to fit his new building. Is your Roman fresco a little too large for your wall? Just trim around the edges to make it fit. Don't quite like the length of your 500 year old hand woven Venetian tapestry? Butcher it down to the right size. No problem at all. I must say the finished product was awesome, if you were prepared to set aside the acts of cultural vandalism that had occurred to make it so. Bloody Designers!

The gardens were the highlight of the visit. With everything from a basic vegetable garden and an orchard to grand tree lined waterways with fountains, ponds, lagoons, and perfectly formed hedging. Apart from the fact that the humidity was almost 100% it was an entirely agreeable way to spend several hours. They also had a couple of signs that were a little disturbing however. Firstly, one of the lagoons had a sign stating "Beware Of The Crocodiles" and a pond featured a similar warning namely "Beware Of The Alligators". For transparency's sake I have to say I saw evidence of neither. That being said I also chose not to take a dip. 

From there I grabbed an Uber to the start of the Deco District in South Beach Miami.  It is littered with Deco architecture (admittedly preferring the New York deco style to that of the Miami). There is nothing more amazing than seeing the Deco District lit up in full neon on a balmy summer's evening. The other thing South beach is littered with is poseurs. They strut around in their hocked to the eyeball sports cars, wearing ridiculously large and chunky fake gold jewellery, sporting their impossibly sized oversized no name brand name watches, while playing loud Latin music and trying to outcool the next guy. The number of young and not so young people squeezing into what I assume is passing for fashionable clothes these days was somewhat disturbing. Sadly not all of them had the physique to pull it off. I of course was dressed in my tuxedo and therefore have every reason to pass comment. 

After making the final mercy dash to secure the greatest breath mint known to man, Altoids, I headed back to the ship. They sounds like a haemorrhoid cream and if you don't agree with me then you can stick them where the sun don't shine, along with your haemorrhoid cream. It was back up the gang plank in readiness for our evening departure.

I have been quite fortunate with the sail outs I've enjoyed on this cruise. The first being New York at night, and now because of a three or so hour delay we left Port Miami around sunset. Watching the Miami skyline come alive at night was magical. 

It was also amazing watching the other ship movements while we were in port. There were two Carnival ships, a Virgin ship an Msc ship and a couple of others whose names are currently eluding me. Check out the video below to get an idea of how busy the port. It is not my video but it illustrates perfectly what happened to me. 

I have two days at sea now before we hit Colombia. No doubt that's when I'll next check in. 

Hurricane Erin

So I have this app that I pretty much had to download to join my cruise. The app told me that I needed to go to the Brooklyn Cruise Terminal to join the ship. I booked the Uber, loaded my bags and headed off. $70US dollars later I arrive to find not the good ship Crown Princess docked and ready to allow my embarkation, but the Island Princess, not the ship I was booked to depart on. I do a simple Google search of "Where is the Crown Princess?" Up pops the map showing it docked in Manhattan and less than a mile from my Hotel I had just spent $70 to leave.  Another $50US later and I am back in Manhattan and ready to board. So after checking the bags, going through the security screening and having various body parts prodded and scanned I finally made it. 

It was now about 3.00pm in the afternoon and to re enter New York City for  the night would have meant an entire security check yada yada yada and I just didn't have it in me. I unpacked, met my steward, and headed for the bar. A few gin and tonics later and the world was a much better place. While all of this was going on the ship's captain was keeping us updated on all matters Hurricane. Our category 4 storm had been down graded to a category 2. It was still heading up the coast but far out to sea. The captain decided to delay departure until midnight the next day so we got ourselves another day in the big apple. 

As you can see from the pics the digs are pretty good. Click on one of the pictures if you want to see it in a larger format. 

I checked if I had to go through the immigration malarky and found I could just walk off the ship and only needed my medallion. I took my passport as well and went to visit another warship. It's like I didn't get enough of that in Honolulu. This ship is the USS Intrepid, and old WWII aircraft carrier that was in operation from 1944 to 1974. Its quite literally littered with old aircraft that used to take off and land from this type of carrier. This particular ship had survived four kamikaze attacks and one torpedo attack. You don't really get the scale of these things until you walk the flight deck and the hangar. 

There was also somewhat incredulously The Enterprise, the test unit for the space shuttle program. It flew a grand total of 20 minutes and never went into space. You couldn't even go inside. There was also a Concorde, which was booked out so I couldn't enter. To finish it off there was a WWII submarine, The Growler. It had about an hour wait to get on board so I gave it a miss. 

I walked the six blocks back to our ship and with virtually no screening got back on board in a heart beat. They didn't seem to care that I was bringing on board a hand grenade (a gift of some chilli sauce in a hand bottle shaped to look like the aforementioned weapon). I also picked up some other essential supplies to satiate the needs of one of my staff.  

I have this special food and drink package so I booked into one of the speciality dining rooms for dinner. The meal was superb however they set a new land speed record in serving me. I walked out a little pissed as I'd consumed a pre dinner drink, white wine with the entrée, red wine with the main and a dessert wine with surprisingly enough, the dessert. At meals end I found myself another bar, joined a trivia team and had a whisky or two. Not troubling the scorer during the trivia (where's Peter Collison when you need him - hopeless!!!) I went up on deck for our midnight departure. 

Seeing the night time New York skyline from the water was nothing short of spectacular. It took over an hour and a half to clear the Verrazzano-Narrows Bridge and into Lower New York Bay and out into the Atlantic. Hurricane Erin had done me a favour. I wouldn't have had the chance to enjoy such a spectacular departure without her.  

Start Spreading The News

It is hard to walk around New York without trying out a few tunes that feature New York. Of course there is the one made famous by ol' blue eyes himself, New York New York. Then you've got the Billy Joel classic New York State of Mind. If that's not enough you can always listen to the Wayne Newton number Danke Schoen, made famous in Ferris Bueller's Day Off, even though the movie was set in Chicago? Then just to top it off finish with Jay Z and Alicia Keys singing Empire State of Mind. So much great music and I defy any one visiting New York being able to do so without humming or trying to sing a few lines out of these numbers. 

With so little time and so many things to choose from it was hard to narrow it down. I've always wanted to do the Guggenheim. Its such an interesting building so I hoped the subway up to 86th Street and walked across "The Park" as the locals call it. Its like an enormous set of lungs giving life to the city. There is much to be said for setting aside some serious acres for green space. Anyway once safely across from the Upper West Side to the Upper East Side I wandered in to the aforementioned museum to be somewhat slightly underwhelmed. 

Now this place has original Warhol's and and amazing selection of French Impressionist including Monet's, Matisse's, and Renoir's and they were without a doubt amazing. They also feature new and up and coming artists and it is there work that left me feeling uninspired. Well at least I can say I have been there. 

From there I had to get organised for the last leg of trip the cruise so I spent the afternoon doing the washing and packing my bags. Anyway enough of that ..................

You can't come to New York without seeing a Broadway show. The last time I was here I caught The Book of Mormon, which I discovered is still running in the same theatre. I probably could have seen Hamilton or one of the other biggies however I spied there was a 13 week revival of Cabaret made famous by the 1972 movie starring Liza Minnelli. Its very much a musical on two levels. The superficial level is all of the bawdy jokes and not so subtle innuendo. The deeper level is a story of tolerance and how insidious was the takeover of German society by the Nazi Party. Much of the audience got, and enjoyed the cheap jokes but I hope they took home the lesson about the rise of fascism and have enough self awareness to know that the lesson might still apply to today.

On that cheery note I headed back to the bar that has pretty well been my local for my stay in New York, The Yard. After a few gin and tonics, followed by a nice Islay Whisky it was time for bed. Its off into the wild blue yonder tomorrow. I embark the good ship Crown Princess and set sail on the Atlantic Ocean, Hurricane Erin permitting. 

I'm In A New York State of Mind

After a solid 11 hours of kip the Magical Whisky Tour hit the streets of New York for a second day. The apartment is two streets away from Penn Station so it was easy to hop the subway to Fulton Street.

It was off to financial district to see all the action. Well you can rest assured that Wall Street looks exactly the same as it does in the movies. However without a whole bunch of guys running around in power suits, sporting a $2,000 pair of shoes, accessorised with a $50,000 watches shouting "sell sell sell" or "buy buy buy" it doesn't give off the same vibe.  

From there we checked out the bull (the symbol of aggressive growth in the stock market). It was surrounded by hundreds of tourists all wanting their photo taken with it to give them luck. It is worth noting that the bull is anatomically correct, so not only does the bronze nose have a nice sheen to it so to do the enormous bronze balls that feature to the rear. 

From the bull we headed to the World Trade Centre. The new building standing at the same heights as the ones razed by terrorist on that fateful day in September 2001. It is hard not stare up at the new one and not think about those poor bastards who jumped to their death 24 years ago. 

From there it was on to Castle Clinton in Battery Park and on to the Staten Island Ferry which is one of the and most effective ways to see the Statue of Liberty without doing a formal tour. 

To finish off the morning's activities we came back up to 14th Street to catch the firehouse prominently featured in the Ghostbusters movies. Who You Gonna Call?

New York is a city for walking so it was time for a power nap before hitting the last place on the agenda being "The Met" or the Metropolitan Museum of Art. If famous artworks are your thing this is the place to go. It has Rembrandts, Monets, Van Goghs, Rodins, Constables and every other famous artist you could care to mention. The place has Egyptian tombs, fender guitars, suits of armor, porcelain and any other object that some one once thought it may be worth preserving. 

After the hit of culture we headed back to the apartment to flake. Tomorrow will be another big day.