Heading to Kakadu

I was really looking forward to this part of the trip, stunning country, remote Australian locations, lots of crocodiles. Having got here I am a bit more ambivalent. I woke up this morning with the start of a head cold courtesy of the dodgy air conditioning at the Darwin Medina. It was really trying hard but the attention to detail was severely lacking. I dined in the restaurant the first night I was there, I ordered a coffee at 7.45pm but they had cleaned the machine. I was awoken at 7.00am this morning by the housekeeping staff enquiring as to when I would be checking out. When I checked the bill they had ripped me off $ 17.00 for parking. I liked Darwin but the care factor is "here's two dollars, when a phone call costs that much give me call".

I kept with my ritual of washing the car in every state or territory and tried to get the last of the Hutt River Province dirt from the Vectra, she must like it as there's still plenty left. I headed out of Darwin and on to the Arnhem Highway where I was held up for a 30 minutes by a pretty serious accident. There had been a single car crash, what I thought was a Ford Festiva had run off the road, ripping away one wheel and there was no likelihood of it ever passing a road worthiness inspection. I found out just how serious  it was as I watched them load a stretcher into the back of a dark, unmarked, refrigerated transit van, there was no ambulance in sight. Some poor bugger was having a much worse day than I was. it made the front page of the paper here today. Click Here to read the story.

The weather was hot and fine (as it tends to be in this part of the world right now). I had booked an adventure tour (whatever that means) and a river cruise but they aren't for the next two days. So I had the afternoon to myself here in sunny Kakadu. As I crossed over into the national park a baby croc strolled leisurely across the road. At first I thought it was a goanna but as I was nearly running it over I saw what it really was, needless to say I didn't stop and play. Crocodiles are everywhere. I did a short walk along the east Alligator River and saw three just around the boat ramp. How you actually launch your boat safely I have not established. 

Well I may have thought the care factor was low in Darwin, here in Kakadu it is non existent. Where I am staying is the famous crocodile shaped hotel, I won't name it as so far the experience has been less than stellar. It has been by far the most expensive accommodation of the trip and from what I've experienced its a total rip off. I initially tried to book online and the website came up as unsecure. Essentially it was using an old, cracked encryption algorithm that meant if I used it I would be exposing my personal details to abuse. Then I called them and I was hung up on twice. Eventually I booked through wotif, because at least that would be safe. 

I am really trying to like Kakadu but by god they are making it hard. I thought that I'd have a shower and freshen up, their shampoo bottle was cracked and I cut my hand. The only option in terms of eating is the hotel restaurant. It has all the charm and intimacy of a council car park. The place is full of tour groups or families with young kids, that's all fine and well but for $ 300.00 a night I want a quiet place to eat, somewhere to chill as I imbibe a nice scotch, not some barn that is doubling as a kid's playroom while hosting over entitled tourists whose daily highlight is to see who they can complain about next. I was thinking I should get myself a caravan because that seemed like a better option (did I really just say that?). They had even run out of the wine I ordered. I mean if you are going to be in the middle of nowhere with and only have a handful of wines available it's kind of important that you stock them all.

What makes matters worse is I think its not going to get any better. I tried to do a bush tucker tour, a gorge cruise and stay two nights in Katherine. Apparently that's too hard. It is not possible to organise those three things through the one place. If I booked the tour and cruise the best accommodation they could manage was a tent (like I am going to pay serious money to stay in a tent!). If I booked better accommodation they couldn't guarantee the activities. Clearly having a willingness to spend money is not enough for the good people of Katherine. I may just push on to the rock and totally give it a miss. 


Having said all the they can't really stuff up the scenery and the wildlife, all very impressive. I did a couple of small walks before I checked in and I must say that the signage tends to grab your attention.

Sadly however we seem to be loving Kakadu to death, there are hordes of people here. If you wanted to commune with nature this would not be the first choice by any measure, I doubt it would even make the top ten.


There are some awesome examples of Aboriginal rock art and to see those was inspiring. Sadly they are crowded with tourists just like me who all seem to be ticking it off their bucket list before they move on to the next event.

Tomorrow I do a Yellow River Cruise and I will follow that up with my four wheel drive adventure the next day where I get to swim in some secluded waterfall lagoons. Why does the thought of going swimming here make me feel seriously queasy? So if some guys gets eaten by a crocodile and makes the news it could very well be me. Oh well it sounds like a pretty hard core way to go.